...after 3 semesters what have i learned?
i have one answer.
What it means to question.
Not to question every idea or practices and assume that they are all wrong but to see what is right about them. No matter how much i tell myself that i am an explorer, a traveler, i never went out of my comfort zone. My dream of being a development worker or to be a politician or lawyer were dreams i had since i was a little girl. I am starting to question all of them but it doesnt mean they are all wrong for me. I had trouble writing the last journal precisely because i went through life following rules and doing what people tells me i should do. I am a people pleaser. never question, just follow. i get a kick from doing so but i never really experience.
Kavanaugh (?), Heidegger, Berdyaev and Abe seems more colorful for me now. Dwelling with reality doesnt mean letting things happen. Being is not about Bohemia. Letting things happen means not letting them fall to where they are. Not to recover life but to reinvent it. to try new things and again, to question life itself.
so, if everything you taught us was a fake. i think ill be all right.
---
one more thought,
Last sem (2nd sem, 06-07) we were talking about politics and the last question haunts me. i forgot exactly what it was as you sir probably do remember. i think it was: What makes politicians have the will to decide for everyone?
i answered then i dont know. (got confused actually) but i think i know now. They can decide for everyone because they know they don't know everything and can possibly know everything and hence makes room for amendments. Also, that at the end of the day nobody can really know about tomorrow. There job is not to stop evil but to mitigate it. Rules after all cannot stop evil, it comes after it (berdyaev) or sin. Some people choose to teach ethics, some people try to make social change happen. At the end of the day, we are all just trying and inventing life. We all are egoself trying to find our trueself. power has many levels. Brings into question, do we have the right to make change? can i answer, if we are all fully human (th131. hahaha)
*am i closer to an "A"?, im not looking for a higher grade or consideration, im just sharing.*
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
just wanted to share
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