Why Women Go Needy?

could it be because...

1. At the end of the day, they just want to be taken care of no matter how strong they portray themselves to be. I think this goes the same for men but women, express this need more. Also, i think because women is relational and social beings, they need and want presence (not pertaining or limited to physical presence).

2. Women has a lot to be insecure about. OK fine. So does Men. Insecurities spells out the need for more compliments and assurance from people she is trying to get attention from.

3. She is looking for more. More than what the other person can give or want to give. Satisfaction is never an easy thing to establish. Striking a balance between reality and dreams has to be achieved. There are few moments in life where the two intersect. So, keep trying because those moments are worth it.

...
of course, these are based on personal experiences... haha. :D

personal lessons on dating...

*if you want maturity, the older the better*
not true. Older men can still have emotional scars that they choose not to recognize. Psych will tell you that they will most likely regress to an earlier and more comfortable stage and hence will act a lot less mature.

im not sure its maturity im describing. lets just say, they will act like a jackass. they might just talk to you about the good old days, their sexual escapades (not that it will all be true) or say that they are better than younger men.

*men and boys likes to play and hunt*
true. it is not good for us to not give hints or not to flirt a little. BUT you gotta make them WANT you. as in crave. DONT lose your power over them, they like it. this does not mean that you should control them because holding back is NOT EASY. BUT best thing i learned is to keep them HUNTING.

*controlling sexual urges is easy*
NOT TRUE. it depends on your "voltage", how much do you want it. some women dont want it as much as others or can control it more than others. Controlling urges is a full time job, it can consume you especially at the beginning of your "exploration".

just wanted to share

...after 3 semesters what have i learned?

i have one answer.

What it means to question.

Not to question every idea or practices and assume that they are all wrong but to see what is right about them. No matter how much i tell myself that i am an explorer, a traveler, i never went out of my comfort zone. My dream of being a development worker or to be a politician or lawyer were dreams i had since i was a little girl. I am starting to question all of them but it doesnt mean they are all wrong for me. I had trouble writing the last journal precisely because i went through life following rules and doing what people tells me i should do. I am a people pleaser. never question, just follow. i get a kick from doing so but i never really experience.

Kavanaugh (?), Heidegger, Berdyaev and Abe seems more colorful for me now. Dwelling with reality doesnt mean letting things happen. Being is not about Bohemia. Letting things happen means not letting them fall to where they are. Not to recover life but to reinvent it. to try new things and again, to question life itself.

so, if everything you taught us was a fake. i think ill be all right.

---

one more thought,

Last sem (2nd sem, 06-07) we were talking about politics and the last question haunts me. i forgot exactly what it was as you sir probably do remember. i think it was: What makes politicians have the will to decide for everyone?

i answered then i dont know. (got confused actually) but i think i know now. They can decide for everyone because they know they don't know everything and can possibly know everything and hence makes room for amendments. Also, that at the end of the day nobody can really know about tomorrow. There job is not to stop evil but to mitigate it. Rules after all cannot stop evil, it comes after it (berdyaev) or sin. Some people choose to teach ethics, some people try to make social change happen. At the end of the day, we are all just trying and inventing life. We all are egoself trying to find our trueself. power has many levels. Brings into question, do we have the right to make change? can i answer, if we are all fully human (th131. hahaha)


*am i closer to an "A"?, im not looking for a higher grade or consideration, im just sharing.*

What have you created lately?

For some time now, in my philosophy of ethics class, we are talking about creativity and its importance in creating ethics and virtues. We all know (if you dont, too bad. :P) that most things or seemingly inherent characteristics in life and in the world are constructed. Like culture, it is more of a social construct than an inherent manifestation of groups of people with the same skin color and or heritage. Anthropologists will say that it is more of geographical location than anything else. Politicians and sociologists will argue that it is something elites or influential people decisively or unconsciously do to uphold or destroy a certain norm. Being familial and hospitable of Filipinos is one example of this. Once when life was about territory, super beings (as in "Malakas" at "Maganda"), deity and battles, bayanihan was something needed for without much protection from the elements, Humans need to flock in order to survive. I believe, even without research (ha!) this was true in all places. Nomads, i think what we call them. However, after industrialization, states, social contracts or in other words change happen, all of the people in the world had a strong sense of bayanihan. Then why is it that we filipinos take pride on making it our own? Yes, truth maybe is that we exude the bayanihan spirit more than other groups of people.

really, Why?

I believe it is because even with change, we are all still threatened. Nearly being introduced to world trade and capitalism, the Spaniards conquered us. there was massive terror and social groups created that called for bayanihan spirit. the KKK (something, something something. :D) is an example of that, a group of people, now recognized as non-peasant group was a call for bayanihan. I dont want to go into full details, but then we had Americans and Japanese to delineate distinctions which then created more "in and out" groups. Of course then there was the dictatorship. Bayanihan was promoted, enforced and highly encouraged by groups of people, it was created because it was, in their opinion, needed.

So what am i saying?... what am i saying?!

Creation is a big part of humans. We are after all co-creators. In ethics, berdyaev will reinterate that it is through creativity or creativeness do one transform life. That from the problems of pharisiastic law to [real] ethics or good.

In a family, certain values are built because it was decided upon intentionally or not. Take for example in my family, my dad wanted super people. :) athletes but smart children. He wanted the world to know that we are special and he brags about us often. This was his decision and manifested into afternoons and nights of training, dinner discussions in english, drinking raw eggs and devouring huge pieces of red meat to build my body up. It wasnt horrible, but most probably different from how you grew up which was the decision of your parents. You became you because of them. Not only but mostly.

Think about this then. What have you created lately?

a bunch of atheist
a group who found pleasure in showing their sexuality
a depressed child
goodness?